Holiness vs. Marriage Part 2: My response

So here's the deal.

For most of my life end-all dream, its seemed, was marriage. 
But marriage isn't an end-all dream.  In fact - its just one desire of many, that will have to be waited upon to be fulfilled.

Here's the thought:  Its not about our desires being fulfilled.  Its about God's desires being fulfilled.

Its not about self-centered view of ourselves and how holiness plays into it, its about a Kingdom-based, God-invested heart where holiness is the very atmosphere that it thrives in.


Paul poses the idea that it is better not to marry if you can.  He also said that it wasn't wrong to marry.

Wait.

Not to marry, if you can?

Topic of Discussion: Holiness vs. Marriage? (Is It Possible?)

This just posted on facebook as a result of much meditation on 1 Corinthians 7 -

So question for all my single/unmarried/dating/engage​d friends out there: Would you opt to stay single if you knew that it would bring more holiness in your life to wait?

I shall post the results for this soon, along with my possibly radical perspective of what I believe the Bible says about one of the single-most priotized desires of humanity - marriage.

You can now find that response here.

A Thought Munching my Brain

You know what really bothers me?  When people draw massive conclusions about key Christian principles such as giftings of the Spirit - off of a few select scriptures instead of taking everything into context.  Its unbelievable to me.  Some things just aren't looked into, good enough and it bothers me how ignorant we can ALL be at times.  My own ignorance in the past and even now makes my heart wince and my spirit ache for truth.    I don't care if I went to seminary for 20 years - if I'm not LOOKING for the REAL truth which will edify the body of Christ, and if I'm  not searching God's heart out in His word,  I will not and CAN NOT  give a living message.  Instead I will teach a legalizing doctrine that lacks in understanding and binds people instead of freeing them.
Hm.

Maybe seminary would ruin me.  I may not have hours of Bible classes down, but I want the truth - even if it offends my mind.  And that's a price I'm willing to pay, if it will edify the Body, glorify my Jesus and punch Truth into the things I preach.

done.  I'm off.

A New Sort of Thought on a Subject, Old, Used and Pretttty Rejected by Me for a While.

Hah! So I was going through some of my old journals today and I found a poem I had written SORT of about my future husband, but more towards where I was about it and it made me smile and then I smiled some more, as though I had some sort of inside joke with myself, being a lot older now, knowing that God has done something crazy in my life when it comes to real romance of the heart.

But I thought I'd share it with all my readers. :) In past entries when I was younger in this blog, I wrote non-stop about such things - romance, etc etc and sooo many people said I was obsessed. Hehe. I was. I'm still smiling though.


Here goes:

"Amidst the Broken Sea, My Dream Lives On" (-sooo dramatic. haha.)

By: Sarah G.
8-30-05
"Thinking, thinking, thinking
So I wonder who you are
the questions running though my heart
are numbered by and far.
Shall I begin an escepade
to tell you what I ask?
When God is nigh and I the deep
come out from past my mask;
confessing much, I'll say,
I try to day the dream away
yet amidst those dark night hours
resurecting as I may.
though curious in state
towards who you are, you see
I'm near convinced, as I scope the world
that you will never be.
Broken hearts - broken seas,
I hold my own dream tight
But Father God said, " You must let Go!"
So I trust with all my might."

I smile because of my little heart ranting on and on for hours about who he might be.
I was more frightened then anything of doing the wrong thing or giving my heart to the wrong person.
FOUR years ago, I wrote this little poem to express the way I felt about the whole situation and I'm so at peace now.

I'm just watching myself react to so much and I think, "I would have struggled with THESE thoughts here, but I don't even worry about it any more..." And its true.

I guess part of it comes to truly letting go of your own hopes and desires and trusting that God's plan for you is so much more precious.

I've been thinking lately that I have a habit of needing to touch the stove and get burned to believe that its truly hot. I seem to just work that way and its rather annoying. But then I think, "Maybe I don't even know what 'hot' feels like, sometimes." And I think I may be right.

I never knew what it really was to guard my heart... and so I had to make a huge mistake to realize "OH WAIT... so THATS how you do it..." after looking at a good burn mark on my hands that will leave a scar with its story.

I just make myself laugh. What a goof off I was when I was younger. What a goof off I am NOW! But, hah! 16 years old, right? I'm DYING to get married and to have romance of ANY SORT in my life. DYING!!!

Now I'm nearing 20 and ..... I just smile. I've never known such a Love as the Love of Jesus. There's a certain place God takes you at some point in your life where God strips you of all your "gold jewlery" braided hair and imaculant garments (like How the prophets talk about God stripping the harlotry away from the children of Israel?) And there I am - just as I am before the Lord. And I am ashamed. I am broken, I am humbled. And He makes me His.

And its in that place, the Lord said, I will call Him "Husband".

Have you ever placed all your antisipation, all your dreams on one person?

I have. Its the only way God could remove it from my life. I lived for Romance instead of God. I lived in the hopes and antisipation of love rather then IN Love.

He's changed that in my heart and now I merely smile a loaded, thoughtful, quiet smile at my young, young self.

"Her day will come," I thought. It will. Someday.

But thats really not the point of my life, is it, anymore? I'm so in love with the Lord. I'm so ready to pursue furthuring His Kingdom, solo. The only way marriage would be an option, I think, is that it would furthur God's Kingdom more because of our partnership then if we were both seperate. I sort of remember when this first dawned on me. I was blown away - ITS REALLY NOT ABOUT US!

It really is not! Its not about me being with the most attractive person. Its really not about me being romanced every day and it certainly is not about ME finding the person who makes ME feel fulfilled at all.

Its about Jesus.
Its about learning how to love in a way that is closest to the kind of love we should have for Him.
Its about being a witness. Its about blessing your spouse. Its about the children you may raise and bring up. Its about honor and respect of boundaries. Its about God and His people, His ways, His Life. Its about God.

When did it get so mixed up?

We grow up being taught to follow our feelings, not the voice of God.
We've grown up in a world where romance is riddled with lust, sex and material items.
I've gone there. It is the most unattractive, unfulfilling experience I have ever known. And its the most revolting. Its so bad its one of the those things I can't even stomache. God's plan is bigger in my life. Its for purity and honor and of true beauty. The church has fallen so deep into the though processes of the world when it comes to these things. I think maybe God wants to give us a heart to change that. I'll start with me.

we're made for something different. God's way is different. Me? Win my heart and THEN ask me to commit. WITH A RING. Not this whole, lets live together and have kids and then MAYBE, when we have enough money, we'll get married. what?!

Hey guys, thats WHAT PEOPLE IN THE CHURCHES ARE DOING TOO!!!

Sigh.


Slighly depressing but I'm not to be faultered in my thoughts here. God has a plan for His people and He's looking for those who understand. Psalms says that.

Its been... wow. probably a year or so since I've talked about this subject in any form. I will not lie - I needed to take a year.

Hey, taking a year off from dating or liking people or whatever, is the BEST THING I've ever done for me, my relationship with God and also, really, in my puruit to honor my husband some day. I've never learned more about my heart then in this past year and Man! Have I learned to focus.

Please do it if you feel led!


Hm. Thats all for now.


Now what to eat.....

Political Awareness for The Church

Elliot Gaiser on the Government of the United States of America: a Fellow Believer's View.










I just want to make it clear that I completely endorse Elliot's view and agree with him souly. If you have issues with my political view, then so be it. But I'm not afraid to speak up about important issues. The people of America should be informed of their roots. AND the CHURCH should not be ignorant. This generation can make a difference if WE know that we can decide what kind of government we should talorate.