Just some thoughts -Not well explained

Hm...

If there was ever a season of writing, THIS is that season.  I'm keeping 2 blogs, tweeting, andddd....3 journals right now for various reasons.

I think its because there's a lot that God is doing in my heart right now.  Lots of good - looking at lots of ugly.
I'm dealing with SO many things that are from years ago - anger, unforgiveness, and all these little girl dreams and things that people have spoken over my life that I've forgotten about ... until now.

I'm surprised at all thats coming out this way, but I guess its time to deal with some things.

God's given me a picture of a hope chest filled with many things - all my childhood and everything that entangled with it.  To open this chest and explore the contents, there IS a catch.  With all the good, I must also face all the bad.

So its definitely been a little journey - one that I've been afraid of, but one that can also be easily fixed:  forgiveness.

But here's the other thing I'm afraid to face:  all my little dreams.

If you read far back enough in this blog, you'll meet an optimistic, romantic, naive, unbroken teenager with the unrealistic, ideal world at her finger tips.
Its been a long time since then, and God is reteaching me that not all that I dreamed of in that time was bad.

Sixteen, going on 17.  6 years ago - and can you believe I've been writing in this blog for that long?

Its hard when everyone's getting married and engaged and YOU'RE the one going through a break-up and readjustment of life.
In all reality though, I've over the break-up.
Its the disappointment that its still not my time yet.

And then to add to all that, everything I know I want (regardless of whether I'm in denial or not) is either right out of my reach and right in front of me (simultaneously)  OR - I just haven't thought of it yet.

So pretty much, its the first one.

I'm going to be real right now:

I don't want to be one of those really cool Christian girls who's just - you just LOVE them - and you can't understand why they're not married yet.   Why God hasn't brought someone around for them.
Unfortunately - haha or maybe fortunately, I have become this very thing.  :)

Is my heart disappointed?  Yes.  I really just want a friend who will know me, enjoy me, dream with me and want me for me.

But will I be okay?

Yeaaah..... I will be.  I always am, anyway.  I'm really not sure what the real lesson is for me right now and I think thats what perplexes me the most at this point today.

I refuse -REFUSE - to take a mindset that question's God's goodness when things aren't going the way I'd like.
Instead, I'm going to be a faithful friend to my lovely sisters who ARE getting married, I'm going to be me, and I'm going to focus on loving people and letting go of the pen to my life.

I DO anticipate what God could do in my life in the next 2 years or so.  I'm actually going to Kansas City for the first time in a few weeks - a road trip with some girlfriends.
I'm pursuing purity on a whole new level - and I'm taking action in guarding my heart better - and guarding the hearts of the one's I love better - both male and female.
And I'm going to try white-water rafting - Something I've always secretly wanted to try.
And I'm applying to go on a mission trip to Africa next June - because I've always wanted to go to Africa since I was 10.
I'm starting to make choices that keep me moving and active and I'm trying to eat better just in general.
And - I'm trying to find opportunities to talk to people about God in the work place.  THATS my deal right now.

The JOY of the Lord is my strength.

I really really really want to bless God and those around me.

I could certainly use yours prayers.
And hey! don't hesitate to write me if you have a thought or a word for me.
I'm always up for that. :)

blessings,

Sarah

The World of His Will: As Seen by Sarah, Today.

At the door of Will.

That is where I find myself these days. Its lovely. Its terrifying. Its where God has me.

I went back and read one of my own poems from about 4 years ago because when I thought of my first sentence for this entry, I could only think of being at the door of my own will.

And then, to follow that thought, the question lies in whether I'm entering IN to my own will, or if I am exiting. And the thought even proceeding THAT thought is: if I'm going in, is that wrong, or if I'm leaving, where AM I going?!


The thing is, we're already in our own will as human beings. Its when we are presented with a NEW will that we have to decide what we are going to do. But either you're stuck in the same old-same old of the room of your own will unless you choose something else: and THAT something else is the will of the Father.

So when I picture being at the door of will, I'm actually picturing standing at exit of mine, and on the threshold of His.


But to be honest, I KNOW I'm in His will. I absolutely do. What I've been having revelation of in the last few days is that EVERY DAY we find ourselves at the door of Will. Every DAY we can either choose our own way, or we can choose the way of the Lord. Every day we choose these things.

I love AND HATE how we go back to "start" every morning. I LOVE it for all the obvious reasons. I only hate it because my flesh desires the credit of yesterdays revelation.

But every day is new. Every day we start back at ground "0" and every new morning is an invitation to "ENTER" into the Will of the Father, which, contrary to my little secluded, one-tracked and single-roomed will, is a GALAXY of adventures waiting to happen!


I've always wondered what it felt like to be side-swiped by the Lord. What it might feel like if He took my word for it when I said I would need to be knocked upside the head with His spiritual 2 by 4's.

Hehe. Its intense. Its adventurous. Its .... dangerous. Its like walking a tightrope - exhilarating yet only done by grace. And its that grace that makes the tightrope like a four-foot wide board, in some regards.

But I find that as I step into this new season of my life, I'm stepping into an accepting of His invitation to live LITERALLY: ON THE EDGE. To walk a path where ANYTHING can happen. Absolutely anything! And to be shaken of the fear of my OWN desires which (though I had always worried would overwhelm other people) coincidentally, more so overwhelm ME than anyone else.

Wow.


I'm seeking His face. I want to know what it is to have God's words like fire in my mouth. I want to have such a deeply ingrained passion for the things and the Words of God that I can feel it in my bones - with every STEP and every move of the joints, that I would feel the passion of God's heart burning IN ME.

Ahhaaaaaah.

I ACHE for the day when faith shall be sight.

I ache for the day when my soul's imaginations of being in the arms of my Father are not only reality, but multi-dimensionally MORE real then what is tangible in this life time!

Oh how I ache for it!!!
And though I am called to all contentedness, I am also called to contend for that which is not seen.

But I want to see it.

I want to SEE the Will of the Father. Not just feel it.
I want to be a See-er in the spirit. I want to see and then to speak it.

Man. I'm not kidding. This is the deepest cry in my heart and it is worth saying no to a few meals and nice things to obtain it.

It is soooo worth it.

At the Door of Will
by Sarah Faith
2006
"You - you are Mine - come to Me."
Father, are You calling?
Silence - or was I really listening?
"You - come to Me - I chose you. Stand out from the rest."
Father, have You called me?
No, it mustn't be, for I am non for best.
"You - Child. It is you - chosen. You will complete My Will."
Father...is that You. God?
"Child! How I love you, come to me!"
Love - silence - will I choose to go or did I ever listen?
Waiting - stillness -pleading - longing - patience.
Will you choose to listen?
"I love you Child - for I stand at the door knocking.
Will you let me in?"

He Paints One Stroke & the Sky Goes Crazy With Love...(A Stroke of Genius, Perhaps?)

So last night I had a lot to think about.

I think I was taking in a meshing of personalities and I was rather agitated that everyone was in my face. This of course is to be expected when your family is mine.

But this morning after the first few hours of becoming awake, things began to hit me and my heart became thankful.

First, just being able to watch people interact with each other. Have you ever noticed that some people can just pick up and become fast friends and the whole room becomes a bustle of jolly commotion as everyone picks around each others' personalities just to find to their delight, that they all enjoy each other and accept each other for their very crazy if not brazen self?

Once, while I was growing up, I was ashamed of how my family was. No one else's family was like mine - that was BAD cause everyone else acted like we were maniacs or something.

BUT - over the past 2 years, I've not only come to terms with how my family is, I rather feel sorry for people who can't handle so much craziness and love.

How do they enjoy their boring, routinely lives? One might argue if they're really living at all.

One thing I rather delight in is how one personality can pull another personality out of hiding.

Its one of the most beautiful things for someone to just accept that they are a certain way and that GOSH! ITS OKAY TO JUST BE YOU!!!!

I think my family is good at that. We most definitely have our problems, HA! Let me be a witness of that! BUT! We're always moving. We're always learning and changing. We have (for the most part) open hearts.

So this is what triggered a thought process of how God, in essence has surrounded himself with... Himself. He Himself is the ESSENCE OF beauty and so ergo, everything He does is beautiful.

I was driving home on 271 and what encountered me as I approached the top of a particular hill was something that took my breath away - a wild dash of orange, pink blue and purple with a swirl of yellow somehow blending in every little corner that was not covered.
The sun screamed orange.

The sky was marveling. It was almost as if every single moment was a span of universe happening and if you blinked you had missed some form of divinity. I swear the sky was glowing and in love.

Ha, and then He said ever so simply, "Its for You."

Of course without missing a single beat I replied, "Well, Yeah... and everyone else you made it for ... AND me... of course!" in between gasps of awe and reminding myself I should probably breath too.

But He plainly restated, "Its for You."

And that's when it hit me:

What did it matter if it could be for anyone else too? God is a sovereign God! Its all the more immaculate that He could have made it for me and ANYONE ELSE He wanted to love on in that little place in time where human met Jesus.

And thats where I was humbled. The live painting was for me. It was between Jesus and His bride. I'm not just single. I'm plural. Its for me just as much as it is for any other part of His Bride. It doesn't mean He would love me any less, He loves ME. He loves US. Of COURSE its for me!


He is awesome.

And, there, on Remsen Rd, I began to cry tears of thankfulness.

He Loves Us.


He really does!


And THIS BLOG is NOT to cancel out my last post!

In one hand the Lord invokes true Justice to all the nations AND to all the peoples.

But, in the OTHER hand, He offers mercy and this crazy grace that says if you repent and confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, He will NOT overlook that!

And for us, as a broken people to get ON OUR FACES before a holy God, is to give Him honor and to show Him real reverence, which, by the way guys, we have NO business losing since, last I checked we're all STILL dirty rotting sinners without Him.

Anyway,

I leave you with this:


Heh. :) He loves us if we are open to Him giving us His love.

Now... If we could get the hang of loving Him back.....

An Unquenchable Heart of Worship

So... For ISOM we have to read a book every 4 weeks and I've read a few great books that really helped me out.

But I have to say, I think I found my favorite.

Its not a self-help book like the rest of them... its a book about the heart of worship, touching up on the different postures one has before the Lord.
I was more blessed by this book then any I've read in a long time, and I think its because Matt Redman GETS IT. A heart of worship isn't because you have an ear and a talent for music! Its a heart position. Its a thing of the heart.

He first talks about the unquenchable worshipper - it talks about how this worshipper is one who will not be extinguished. He could go through hell fire and brimstone and it wouldn't matter, because His praise would continually be on his lips.

Something that this part insinuated was that... you can almost see the beauty of God MORE through the hurts, the pains and the sorrows... because the more pain you go through, if you lean on the Lord, the greater His beauty is.

"Though overwhelmed by many troubles, they are even MORE overwhelmed by the beauty of God."

This is ... so admirable. So honorable. This sort of pushing through isn't something that says, "I'm okay, really. Nothings wrong!" but rather says with humility, "I am NOT okay. But I don't care. Just because I'm not okay doesn't mean that He doesn't deserve my praise. I will worship Him ANYWAY."
wow.
this attitude is such an offering unto Jesus.

my favorite quote here is by B.W. Anderson (and if you're a musician, you'll appreciate this even more):

"The laments are really expressions of praise - praise offerings in a minor key in the confidence that Yahweh is faithful."

A second posture is that of an undone worshipper. You'd think it was talking about how God so sweetly brings you to your knees, but its not really like that.

This also hits such a core with me (as do all of them, so I may just get it out of the way right now and tell you that each one of these postures are near and close to my heart.) The undone worshipper... is humiliated in the presence of a Holy God. They are put back into their place. They thought they were something and found that those somethings were really offensive to God - pride, little attitudes that brew up inside of our hearts that we don't see until its exposed by the light of His glory. And so, we may fight it or we may not, but an undone worshipper throws up his hands and cries out in ruins, "OKAY LORD! I QUIT! Here I am! I surrender!"
Its painful, but it hurts SO GOOD. To finally give in to the Lord? There's nothing so freeing then to just let it go!
You cannot be a true worshipper unless you are brought to the end of yourself and allow yourself to be humbled in the sights of a Holy King.

As Fancois Fenelon said so wisely (can't we just soak in this wisdom?): "

All our falls are useful if they strip us of a disastrous confidence in ourselves, while they do not take away a humble and saving trust in God."

This next posture just blows me out of the water: this is something the Lord is really working in my heart about, and if you let Him, He'll work in yours as well...

Undignified worship. I like to call it "Awkward Worship" because that's what it is: awkward. God's really been pushing me into an awkward state: invictus. having an uncomfortable spirit... being uncomfortable in worship - being so awkward that I CAN'T say that I did a polished job and that the only thing I CAN say is, "well... it wasn't for the people anyway... It was for God."

God has been bringing me to this point a LOT lately... its REALLY awkward. Did I say that?! Because I've never felt this awkward since 7th grade! But that's okay - "True worship always forgets itself" and true love never counts the cost.
I'm learning that in order for me to trust the Lord the way He wants me to, I need to stop counting the cost, and allow Him to shake me and change me and make me totally uncomfortable in such a way that the only thing for me to do that IS comfortable.. is to seek His face and worship Him with a whole heart.

The unpredictable worshipper is one that shakes the church... THE Church, and thank the Lord for the ALLOWANCE of unpredictable worship. This chapter was based off of the woman who washed Jesus' feet with her tears. It said,

"It was the act of a woman who had not been tamed by cynical religious attitudes...it was the worship of a woman who didn't know the rules - an unpredictable untamed heart on a quest to see Jesus glorified."

WOW.


Here's the truth that makes me want to WEEP because it says truth so beautifully - Religion must never be allowed to dampen romance.

This truly goes along with undignified worship... with awkward worship. It needs to not know the "rules" sometimes. It throws people off... but it brings them to a REALITY that God wants RAW and REAL, not polished and plastic.

We need to lose the politically correct term of saying "I'm a worship leader" and start saying the truth... "I lead Worshippers".


The Unveiled Worshipper is risking a LOT and yet, that's how it should be: Allowing God to open you up completely to Him... and making you completely vulnerable to Him and to the intimacy He wants with you.
to be unveiled is to be clean and completely trusting...
and what Matt starts to talk about is when you DO COME CLEAN, you realize the need to present yourself as holy and acceptable to Him as possible. We wouldn't wear ripped jeans and a T-shirt to meet the president, would we? How much MORE should be prepare ourselves to come before the King of the Universe?!
He is HOLY. Yes! I can bring myself just the way I am, but If I've TRULY encountered God, I COULDN'T go back to being the same!! I WOULD KNOW I've encountered Him because I WOULD try my best to TURN from the things that hurt Him and present myself to Him beautiful, holy. Pure!


The Unstoppable worshipper is a BOLD worshipper. I think this intimidates people because Christians take this and forget that being an unstoppable worshipper is NOISE unless it is coupled with humility and love. This is close to the unquenchable heart except that THIS posture is turned more outwards to be an example to others. This is the evangelistical heart - not being stopped by little hindrances but being adventurous and creative, stepping out to talk to people about what the Lord has done. Notice that this doesn't have to do with music. This has to do with being a WITNESS for Christ. Witnessing is worship. What is true worship when you praise the Lord on Sunday and then stay silent at work on Monday? The unstoppable worshipper praises and serves the Lord 24/7. They never stop! THAT is what we should strive for! This is what I need to be doing a better job of.


THIS one... this one is my heart in its truest sincerity:
to be an unnoticed worshipper.
Who cares about being up on stage? Who cares about who's watching and who's not...
to offer up worship... as quietly - as privately as possible is what my heart longs to do.

And to be honest, I've been doing a terrible job. Its hard when you're up on stage to not put on a show... Gosh... its REALLY hard. You HAVE to lead them... and you forget that YOU'RE there too... you know?
A true leader of worshippers needs to be devoted in the secret place... when no one else is there. The test for those won't be about the excellence of a played song, or the cleverness of written words, but the integrity.. the godliness of the person leading.

Once again I quote Francois Fenelon who said "make yourself little in the depths of your heart."

CHEW. chew. swallow.
bring it back, chew some more. Chew again. Let it sink in. WOW.

Its in the secret place that counts. How I am convicted.


I am. Right now, I am convicted. I have neglected the Lord. Why? He's given me no reason to! Why? Because I suck, that's why.


The second to last one is... the Undivided worshipper.

This talks about not being distracted. OR being a distraction. For me, this really convicts me about the opposite sex. Am I distracting THEM from the Lord? Are they distracting me? What about work? Am I so busy that I have no time to give God?
is it what I can escape to and pretend that like that's why I couldn't love the Lord like I should?

WOW guys. WE REALLY DO SUCK.

The day I struggle with thoughts about guys is the day I've taken my focus off of God.

its true. I KNOW God doesn't want me to focus on that right now. I KNOW He hasn't revealed a guy in my life. So I KNOW it isn't Him who is giving me thoughts to confuse my focus.

I need to have an undivided heart! It doesn't mean that the things that are distracting me are in themselves a bad thing, but the FACT that they ARE distracting me means that I need to set myself some guidelines and boundaries for my MIND and focus on the Lord. We need to worship Jesus louder then the noise of distractions sometimes... and WOW is that a hard thing to do. "To obey is better then sacrifice".

You can serve serve serve the people around you, but never actually take the time to seek His face.
He calls His disciples unto Him! You may THINK your sacrifice of service is enough, but you're disobeying the call of God. You're being disobedient. We need to remember... There are OTHER servants to do that job... for now, we need to just sit at the feet of Jesus, and take some time with Him.


the last posture of worship is that of an Unsatisfied worshipper. When you begin to understand the necessity of the presence of God and the joy that is found IN it, the world just doesn't cut it anymore. Its dull and shallow and dim in comparison.

The unsatisfied worshipper GETS IT. He gets that he'll never be satisfied until he gets to the thrown-room of God where true worship will be TRULY fulfilled!

With that world-view, NOTHING looks the same anymore! This place isn't our home! This food isn't even close to the feasting on the EVERY word of God we'll be entitled to in heaven! The riches here won't even COMPARE to the Glory of the common ROADS we walk upon in heaven the same way we walk upon concrete! We can't be satisfied any other way except when the presence of GOD is manifested more and more in something. That's the only way we'll even be able to be OKAY with something anymore!


I am so... convicted by this little book.

This is where my heart should be. Is it? CHH. No.
It needs to be though.

wow.


(wanna go back and count how many times I said that expression over and over again?)


I dunno. That's all I got for tonight folks.

After the Twenty First Time, Its time I got my hands dirty.

There's a song that has really impacted me a lot lately. Every time I hear it, it blows me away.

Monk & Neagle - The Twenty-First Time

Nowhere to live, nowhere to fall
He used to have money, but he’s wasted it all.
His face is a photograph burned in my mind,
but I pretend not to see him for the twenty-first time

He sleeps under stars, that’s all he can afford
His blanket’s an old coat he’s had since the war
He stands on the corner of Carter and Vine
But I pretend not to see him for the twenty-first time

He may be a drifter, he’s grown old and gray
But what if he’s Jesus and I walk away?
I say I’m the body and drink of the wine
but I pretend not to see him for the twenty-first time

She’s twenty-nine but she feels forty-eight
She can’t raise three kids on minimum wage
She’s cryin’ in back of the welfare line
but I pretend not to see her for the twenty-first time

She may be a stranger tryin’ to get through the day
but what if it’s Jesus and I walk away?
I say I’m the body and drink of the wine
but I pretend not to see her for the twenty-first time

This is a call for a change in my heart
I realize that I’ve not been doin’ my part
when I needed a Savior, I found it in Him
He gave to me, now I’ll give back to them

Drifter or stranger, father or son
I’ll look for Jesus in every one
’cause I am the body and drink of the wine
and I’m thankful there’s more than the twenty-first time

This song hits me hard in that... we SAY we love poeple. We SAY we're doing our best to be Jesus' hands and His feet...

but then, What are we like inside our hearts? What thoughts do we entertain in our brains?

Does it seem like you turn away and ignore whats going on around you, for the twenty first time?

You want to know why 21 is so important?

it means that 3 TIMEs, we as the body had 7 opportunties to be Jesus to the world.

and 3 times 7, we ignore the tug of the Holy Spirit.

the part that gets me about this song is that it can relate to us as idividuals, OR as the Body of Christ in one person. What the body does is what we do. We're His Bride. We are One Body.

So figuratively speaking, the Body has turned and looked the other way, rather then to get their hands dirty with someone else's sin.

How many times does the Lord get His hands dirty with our sins.

How many sins did he bear on the cross.

How many times did He hurt because of us,

and yet we think we're too high above to "stupe down the their level".

How many times do you think Jesus could have had that attitude... that He's too high above us to stupe down to our level?
How many times do we forget who God is and who He's call us to be?

We sing along to Hands and Feet by Audio Adrenaline. But what have we done besides say the words and go on with our lives?

Do you know that the band couldn't just write the song and do the same?

They had to LIVE IT OUT AFTER THAT.
They couldn't just be hypocritical. They started an orginization. They WENT places. They did THINGs. They got down and dirty and made a difference.

"But they're a band!" you say. "They can DO that stuff!"

So?

I'm a worship leader. Does that qualify me any less?

I'm a girl who loves Jesus. Does THAT qualify me any less?

I can't write this and not try to make a difference.

Can you read this and not be convicted to do the same?

I dare you to follow Jesus and be the outcast he's called us all to be with Him.

I'll try my best to be a voice in the dessert as the personality that I am and proclaim, "prepare ye the way of the Lord!"

In the name of Jesus so let it be done.

How fanatical are YOU willing to be?


Or are you even willing?

Pearls, Swine and Being Released

A LOT has been happen with me as of late.

First, the sermon of casting your pearls before swine was... WOW.

I've never been so... (is it weird to say) Loved on in a sermon before.

I've found that its okay not to give your pearls of great price to anyone and everyone. I may be doing that here in this blog, but I guess thats part of my blog. Those who come here must like to read it, otherwise they don't come (har har, I laugh at myself.)

But a pearl comes with with a great price because it was something that I worked at.

pretty much a pearl is a piece of sand or whatever that gets into an oisters mouth, and it irritates the oister so it covers this thing with layer upon layer of smooth "whatever" on this thing till it is smooth and ... a pearl.

So the pearls in our lives are the painful things that we can't ignore and we work at and work at until it is a precious part of our lives.

Pigs?

Pigs take and eat anything. When the rubber meets the road, a dog will return to its vomit and a pig after being cleaned, to her mud pit.

They have no concept of what precious compared to scraps is.

Why would I give my very best, my most precious parts of my life to those sort of people?

This is an ubelieveable realization to me.

Thoughts have definitelly been more defined and its actually encouraging to think about this because it finally holds up my accomplishments (with Jesus) of my Character as pearls.

I've always had a special spot in my heart for pearls. I'm begining to realized why.

Dimonds are very gaudy. They boast of their beauty, when really, they are just rocks that have been reshaped, chipped away at and made into something they never were before.

Pearls however, don't SCREAM and sparked their beauty. They've always been more modest about themselves being a treasure. They seem to have a quieter sense of beauty, you know?

And this is what I've seen: it is because it was a piece of dirt, a piece of dust molded and refined, organically smoothed over, and worked at (worked at from its being dirt) and made into this thing of great price - it came with a great cost.

And then there's the parable of the pearl of great price, and of a man selling all he had to buy a feild where the pearl was to be found.

What pearl would be so wonderful that a man would sell all he had for it?

I always thought of the pearl as God.

So someday, I sort of hope that my engagement ring will be like this: 2 little dimonds with a pearl in the middle. We've been chipped away and made into the people that can now be brought together, but in that process, what would have been dirt had we not waited on Gods timing, because this beautiful treasure between us: and that pearl would represent God, the waiting, .. just EVERYTHING that holds us together.


so yes, pearls mean very much to me.

The releasing part?


I was told I am not called to meet specific needs right now.

Truth is? The person who told me this was absolutely right.

This is my life verse right now:

1 Corinthians 7:32-35

But I want you to be without care. He who is unmarried cares for the things of the Lord—how he may please the Lord.
But he who is married cares about the things of the world—how he may please his wife.
There is[a] a difference between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman cares about the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit. But she who is married cares about the things of the world—how she may please her husband. And this I say for your own profit, not that I may put a leash on you, but for what is proper, and that you may serve the Lord without distraction.

Sing to the Lord a New Song.

so I wrote a new song. it has almost a messianic sound to my "Sarah" sound.

Anyway,

enjoy the lyrics.


My Attempt to Glorify.

By Sarah Faith


I've tried and cannot express the way You are
Radiance and splender are no-dimension words by far
and You're bigger than my thoughts, Oh God.

From one breathe of Your lips, the stars were formed and shaped.
In the span of Your great hand You hold and call each one by name.
Who is man that You would think thoughts towards me?
Who am I to You in this vast galaxy?

[I am a vapor, a wave on the sand. just one in a billion
and yet you take my hand.]

As Your Lightnings blast the skies
the oceans roar all Your praise
the mountains tremble as the earth quakes in Your name.
And who am I that all that I have to bring
are some simple chords strummed to a melody?

[up from the dust I'm called - thats me
somehow resembling powerful Beauty]

Rescuer, Your name is chilvary
Highest One, You're Right arm is Mighty
Fire goes forth before Your mouth to consume my enemies
YHWH, Father, my Hero and my King.

Stepping into creation You painted with Your hand
Forming to our custums, confined to our sinners land
Who are You that You would care enough to be
so degraded to save us - to show You know our needs?

[letting us abuse you with all of our shame
ignorant that we had hung you on a tree You yourself had made...]

Rescuer - You won us on a tree
Healer - Your wounds are mine for me
Highest One, Praise from my mouth won't cease
YHWH, Abba, to You I bow my knee.




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the words in brackets are optional.



anyway, thats my song and my sisters love it (at the point no one besides them has heard it sooo....)


anyway, be blessed.